The wife and I are located in Alabama. The childs mother swept her up and ran to Indiana. The mother of this child is of low class to say the least. Will give about 2 baths per week to the child, has no structure as in bed time or rights from wrongs and one year ago, turned the child loose in a yard with a shepard that ended with mauling the little girls face. The mother is now fighting a law suite and all that she can think of is getting a new car with the proceeds. We (wife and I) actually fear for this small one, but have been told that because I am a step parent, that I have no say in this. Sure my money is good to an attorney, but I cant get a straight answer as to our legal chances. I mean 4000. to an attorney just to be told "no way" would make me angry at best. What about crossing state lines for this? How does all of this work? This is a situation that I am very unskilled with. Thanks for all understanding responses.
Answers:
No.
I hate to say it, but even though you don't care for the circumstances and environment this child is being raised in (hey, I don't either by the sounds of it!) you don't have a court case at this point, nobody does.
Not until there is proof that this mother has on several, not just one, but several ocassions, either put this child's life in danger, or severely neglected or abused her. Remember that there are horrific cases of abuse in homes and child protective services still give the parents another chance. They resist removing a child from the parental home until they feel the parent has exhausted all possible chances, and that usually includes extensive counseling and child protective services visits and monitoring.
One dog mauling incident is not much in the court's eyes. It could happen to anybody, even the best of parents. Dogs are unpredictable, and never will a court hold that against the parent for a single incident.
What else do you have? Not enough baths for your standards will make the courts laugh. I'm just being honest with you here!
Things that the courts will listen to include such things as: proof of neglect, such as leaving the child home alone, proof of abuse, such as hitting the child in public or broken bones, etc., proof of drug involvement, such as the child actually ingesting drugs herself or swat raids to the home, (and even one swat raid is not enough!), or, in this case---that self-proclaimed "sex addiction".
Sex addicts are unwell. If you can get any proof that this child has witnessed sex acts on several occasions, then you might just have a case. True sex addicts stop at nothing. If this woman is truly a sex addict, at some point she will involve the child in the activities, if only to hold the camera. Only after she has done so will the courts remove the child from the home. From the sounds of this situation, I would say do your homework on this particular part of this child's life. If you see the child alone sometimes, ask her questions about sexual activity. Then, if the child reveals that child sex abuse has taken place, only then do you call child protective services.
The court process is long, tedious, and flawed, and often takes years. But this is the only method to remove a child from a parental home. The local child protective services make this decision, not a judge after hearing the case that your lawyer presents, who only has the role of aiding your case if you decide to sue for custody after child protective services has declared the mother unfit.
I painted a grim picture, but I'm just trying to help you see how the process works. I hope that you can convince your grand-daughter's mother to allow the child to have week-long visits with you, etc., where you can find out from the child if anything abusive is happening. And, even then, the court's are often unwilling to accept just the tales of a minor. You will need an adult as a witness, or child protective services, and child protective services will hire a child psychologist to witness for the child's version of stories.
Your best bet is to have the mother give you custody. If you can take care of the child for her often, she may just decide that she likes having her free time. At this point, until you have more proof, I suggest you work with the mother instead of against her.
One more thing--If you ever get child protective services involved, remember that at that moment you have in essence, terminated your visitations with the child. The mother will no doubt stop letting you see her. I did some homework online, and Indiana has no grandparent rights. Another reason that I suggest that you work with the mother, stealthily ask the child questions, and only get the state agency involved once you have something firm that is some kind of definite abuse.
What I'm saying here is that if this case goes to court, it will be the state agency child protective services representing the state of Indiana, and the case will be "Indiana vs. _____(insert your step-daughter's name).
See how you are taken out of the equation?
Good luck.
Hmm, that certainly makes it fuzzier. Keep in mind that taking a child from it's rightful and legal guardian -- no matter how bad she is -- and taking the kid across state lines is a felony and equals many years in Club Fed.
That being said, I think now you have a much greater chance of getting custody, especially with the lawsuit and the dog-mauling bit. You have fewer rights than your wife, as the steppgrandparent, but if you and your wife appeal for custody of the child together that should eliminate that.
I think you have a great case, you should get a lawyer asap.
Go here and ask.Lot's of attorneys that will give you advice
http://forum.freeadvice.com/
You have not custodial rights to this child. The mother I assume has not been determined to be unfit, and her custodial rights have not been termiinated by a court. Your perception of the mother may or may not be accurate, but even if it is, without court intervention, you cannot do anything about it. Even if you were her natural parent, you would have no standing to act on this. Now if you feel the child is legitimately in danger, you could report this to DCYS (youth services) and have them monitor or investigate the situation. If there is a determination that she is an unfit mother, it's POSSIBLE that you could get custody as foster parents or guardians. But based upon the facts you gave...even including the dog incident...it is highly unlikely.
Has Child Protective Services (aka Social Services) ever been involved? If you truly believe the child is in danger or has been abused, abandoned or neglected, you need to call the abuse hotline in the state the child lives in. However, please do not call the abuse hotline out of anger or retribution, it is truly a horrible thing to accuse someone of child abuse if they are innocent. It can cause heartache not only for the parent, but for the child as well.
Having an unstructured lifestyle, having low moral standards, or being "low class" do not constitute child abuse, but inadequately supervising a small child, especially if it resulted in injury to the child, certainly does. Once the hotline has been contacted, an investigation will occur which could take several months to complete. The child will be interviewed, as well as the parents and others who have contact with the family. The outcome can range from nothing happening to criminal charges being filed against the mother. The child could be placed in foster care if a suitable relative or family friend cannot take custody--and don't just think that they will give the child to you automatically, there is an extensive background check process. Unless there are verified findings of abuse, neglect or abandonment, it's not likely that you will win custody of the child in court. Judges don't like to take children from their parents unless it's absolutely necessary.
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